This Is The New Year

 

Hello. Happy 2024. It's the middle of January, and it is cold. We've had issues with our water this week, and the reminder of the precariousness of the system on which we so heavily rely has been sobering. So to has the fatigue I have not been able to sleep away, and the general malaise that normally happens at this time of year. There's this constant push-pull as the calendar flips over: push - planner reset, and goals and plans, dreams and hopes for the next 365 days; pull - relax, release, hibernate, it can all wait until spring. Spring should be the beginning of the year, and that's a fact.

I am also feeling that this year is going to be special, in that nothing special is planned. It's a year where I am going to have to sift through a decade's worth of disorganised work (am awaiting an ADHD/autism review and frankly, I wouldn't be surprised if that's what's going on because my disorganisation is epic and confusing, because here I thought I was so organised! But I digress.) as well as deal with a lifetime of thinking that doing was more important than being or healing, or almost any other positive, foundational inner structure. Where self talk needs looking at and my nervous system needs to learn how to regulate itself. It's a year of simplification, but not the old kind I know how to do (ie: purge and start again). And I can't currently explain what I mean, because I don't really know yet. I just know that it's not what I've already been doing. And I know that because if what I have already been doing worked, I wouldn't be in this position now. Well, not entirely, anyway.

So the little online organisational thinking that I have managed so far looks like this:

• reinstate my blog, whether rebooting this free space or going back to Squarespace, I am not sure. It will all be at woodlandandsea.com (eventually), so no need to worry about that part of things.
• absolutely leaving Substack. It was interesting, but it hasn't felt right for awhile, and given the latest developments in the culture of Substack, I don't really want to stay there. But I will reiterate that I have felt weird there for awhile, and I'm not sure why.
• streamline and simplify. IG will stay. VSCO will stay and I need to remember to use it. Threads is... ok for now. Mostly good, actually, but I need to limit it. As I get back into art (thankfully the azathioprine seems to be helping the arthritis), I will use Behance again. As to the rest...honestly, what's the point of online spaces you never use? A lot of clearing out will need to happen. And only doing what feels good, even if that changes.

So, thank you, if you have followed me around the internet, as I have tried and trialled various ways of being. I think I am getting clearer, and that's a good thing.

So, that's where I am for right now. I hope you are well. Take care.